To the Ladies of Northern Virginia,
I just wanted to say that I know the public bathroom antics are out of control right now.
I swear I'm doing my best, but my toddler is obsessed with all things potty right now. (Of course, he hasn't actually used the potty for the last two weeks, but that's another post.)
The planets have aligned in just the right way to make using the public bathroom my personal nightmare right now.
First off, there is a small human residing directly on top of my bladder. This ensures that is it nearly impossible to leave the house without using a bathroom at least once.
Second, my son has learned all about pee and poo and really likes to talk about it (preferably to strangers in a loud voice).
Third, my son has suddenly put two and two together and realized that boys and girls "have different pee pee parts". I figured this out when he suddenly tried to pee standing up the other day "like dada".
He is also a little more interested in my parts and what I'm doing on the potty these days. This new interest is a bit awkward at times, especially given the fact he likes to add color commentary. (On a positive note, I have some great material to embarrass the heck out of him as a teenager now.)
Last, but certainly not the least in terms of sheer adventure, is the fact that he has suddenly learned how to open bathroom stall doors of every conceivable design.
And like all new skills, he feels this one needs to be practiced at every opportunity that presents itself. (I'm not sure how many people I've flashed at this point, but I hope nobody had a cell phone camera handy.)
I'd also like to extend an extra special apology to the woman who was quietly trying to do her business in the stall next to us at Target last week. I'm sure being loudly congratulated on pooping in the potty in a very crowded bathroom by the little man in the neighboring stall wasn't the high point of your day.
(I did at least successfully keep him from peeking at you under the stall, which is not always the case.)
I really am doing my best, even if that isn't even remotely obvious.
Please accept my sincere apologies,
Me
P.S. Please no comments on how this only gets more fun with multiple offspring along. I just can't think down that path yet.
23 comments:
OMG I love the whole potty training and when they figure out the difference in boy and girls. I will never forget my daughter asking my hubby in target if he wears panties like mommy. I thought he was going to die.
well. all is forgiven when you have children.
It gets.....better. Sure, that's right better. Nothing that boys like better than the potty which transforms into potty humor.
How about instead I just comment and say I think the lady was actually quite flattered to be praised for her natural abilities. Sometimes, we need to celebrate the little things. Or big things depending on how long she was in there.. :-)
Thanks for the laugh about the loud congratulations to the next-stall pooper at Target!
My little guy has no interest in getting on the potty. When I ask, he says, "maybe tomorrow."
...and i thought it was bad when my daughter needed to try every restroom- on the premise of using the potty, but in reality, just to see what color the soap was. i see now that i had it way too easy. good luck... i cannot fully imagine your pain!
Okay, I won't tell you.
This just happens with most kids. I so remember. Fun isn't it? Not.
Have a terrific day. :)
Are you kidding me? I don't take all of my children at once into an actual store with civilized adult people in it-unless Hubby is available to come with and help me corral them!
Any mom in the world will think it's cute that he is so "colorful" about the potty-someone without children might be annoyed, but eventually they too will suffer public embarrassment at the hands of their own spawnlings and then they will feel only sympathy.
Ahh, those days are over for me and I don't miss them at all.
Wouldn't it be funny if that lady went home and wrote in her blog about a cute little boy who congratulated her on her potty prowess. :)
Oh Joy! I remember those days ... which are really only slightly better now .. and he will be 5 next week!
Oh my goodness. He congratulated someone in the next stall.. that's priceless! Luckily, we don't go far from home these days so I can hold it but I'm dreading potty training since it'll mean public bathrooms.
These days are just beginning for me...the part with the toddler...not the baby on the bladder (not again, yet, that is).
Hang in there...as long as you can laugh, that is saying something!
Had I been the woman in the stall, I would have burst out laughing. Of course, had I been you, I'd have been mortified. :)
Good luck with your little potty enthusiast! I share your pain.
Oh no. There is nothing worse than potty antics!! Be strong, K!!!
Awwww....I remember those days.
And I think "pee pee parts" would make a great band name, no?
Wendi
www.wendiaarons.com
When a boy is learning to pee standing up, it is amazing they can hit every wall in the bathroom by just standing in front of the john..
I remember being in a stall once and hearing a little girl say, "MOMMY! What PRETTY big girl panties you have!
That was years ago, and it still makes me chuckle.
Ahh, all these things shall pass away. At least you'll have them all nicely recorded here for posterity.
I recall when my daughter was realizing about Mom and Dad's differing parts, she went around telling people that boys have a penis, while girls have "just a regular bottom."
:)
Very funny post! I just stumbled across your blog and laughed so hard that I thought I would comment, hope you don't mind.
I feel deeply for you, we just got out of this phase at my house, but we still have relapses from time to time. And my 3 year old girl just loves to tell EVERYONE the difference between boys and girls. Even when we are at church, and everything is very quiet.
If you'd like to stop by my blog I'm at Cake Crumbs.
Oh what fabulous fun! My mom tells me about when she would take a bit longer in the bathroom than usual, and I would ask her loudly "mommy, are you going number 2?" She would pretend, of course, that I wasn't her child. :) I'm sure it can be embarassing, but I just can't wait till mine is that age!! I reserve the right to change my mind....
When my oldest was around 3 and was in the stall with me, cuz you know I'm not going leave him outside the stall...too dangerous...He loudly announced that all the feet were pointed in the wrong direction in the other stalls. (never mind my feet?)...I thought he was a genius for even noticing this fact.
I abhor public bathrooms and now my youngest has to inspect every single one of them. :/
I'm curious...how did he know the lady next door was pooping?!?
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